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Much Love to the Self-Employed

My sister and her husband own their own businesses and I’ll tell you, they work twice as hard as most corporate Americans.  Working for yourself takes a lot of drive and a lot of self discipline in order to get out there and promote your business all the while working it and running it (staff included or not).  It is tireless work.  It’s not only a huge investment in yourself, but it’s a huge investment in your community as well, where ever you are!  It’s a lot of effort, period.  And I’m not just going to speak for those who run their own business, I’m even talking about those who work for a company yet are essentially self-employed, making their own hours, working around their lifestyle and/or home life, kids, activities, outside jobs, etc.  A lot of skeptical people call them pyramid schemes, and while they are pyramids by way of how the entire process works, it’s still something that works for those who need a second income and/or those who prefer to work from home.  These are the folks I’m talking to/about.  While you may still be working for a company, you are essentially working for yourself and it’s much like owning your own business.  It can take just as much effort, sometimes more I feel like!  So, here’s to you guys!

I want to start by saying you are a badass!  You are hustling!  It’s hard work and I mean that in all sincerity!  It doesn’t matter if the product sells itself, essentially, you are busting your butt, working hard, making goals, achieving goals, and usually, all the while you are doing other things like: being a mom, working outside the home, you really believe in this product so you are marketing yourself and putting yourself out there (that takes a lot of courage)!

Most people don’t realize the amount of discipline one must have in order to “make a little extra,” or hit “sales goals” either so you can stay home with your kids, you’re between jobs and absolutely need an income, needing a second or third income just make ends meet or achieve that lifestyle you’ve always dreamed of, savings for your children and their futures, savings for yourself and your future, working to pay off debts (like student loans) faster, side cash for those items you would never otherwise dream of having.  You guys seriously freaking rock and I’m proud of you for putting yourself out there and putting in the work it takes for whatever goal(s) it is you’re trying to achieve!

And I fully want to support each and every one of you.  In fact, most of the time I do just that in the ways that I know I can!  I like your posts.  I don’t like them out of obligation by any means.  I want to support you and I know a lot of times people will start coming to you by how many likes you get on your social media.  So, I like your post!  I want you to get as many likes as you can to achieve your goal and gain more interest in whatever it is that you’re selling or promoting!  I also recommend you to my own friends.  Let’s just say I have a few friends who are very embarrassed to go to the gym.  Not only is their gym expensive and certain “classes” are at certain times that are inconvenient because of work or other priorities, but they really want to lose some weight or eat healthier.  I recommend your business, or you personally.  I want everyone to succeed in a way that’s beneficial to everyone!  I also buy things when I can afford them.  I have one friend in particular who sells a make up product that doesn’t affect my skin on a day to day basis.  I purchase that product from her because I believe in it as well, I just don’t want to sell it (I know you make a little more income if I were to sign under you, but truth is, I don’t very much care to sell things).  I also share your posts (if it’s allowable on your social media of course).  I want to help market you as much as I can so sometimes I share your marketing post that I feel really promote not only who you are, but the product you’re selling as well that is most generally great for a lot of the people on my own social media.

The best thing I do for you, however, is writing encouraging comments on those posts.  I want you to continue to grow your business and grow yourself!  I want you to hit those goals and not give up because maybe your sales have plateaued.  It happens, but I want you to keep going.  Sometimes start ups are slow, especially if you’re just starting out and it’s something a lot of people are selling so you’re competing with a lot of folks out there.  I know a lot of you have personally messaged me about your product.  You’ve asked me if I’m interested in your product.  I want you to continue to message people!  You probably already know it’s more than likely a polite, “No, I’m not interested at this point in time,” but always know that I still fully support what it is you’re doing!  I want you to keep up the hard work you’re putting into yourself and keep going despite my own decline or rejection.

I’m going to be super honest here.  Yes, I have lied to some of you when this sort of work really became a thing.  I was a coward and simply didn’t want to tell you I wasn’t interested, I didn’t want to be the bad guy that kept you from making an income, I just simply didn’t like to feel guilty that I couldn’t help you.  From most of the first experiences I had with folks who do this very thing, I was either harassed in personal messages and had to block them from contacting me or deleting them from my social media, or I would receive unsolicited advice that made me feel ashamed that I wasn’t supporting you financially.  That always hurt because I want to support you, I want you to succeed and not to be discouraged by those who say no, but I don’t feel that because I said no that I deserve such behavior.  Most of you do a very good job at communicating a thank you and that you’ll try at another time, or you simply tell me to get ahold of you when I’m interested.  Those folks I truly appreciate so very much and I have always continued to support you in the way that I can and know how to, all 112 of you on my Facebook at least!  I only have 368 friends on Facebook so to have 112 of you selling products, well, that’s a lot to be honest, just under half of you!  I’ve also, for some of you, had every intention of following through with actually supporting you financially, but as we all know life can get in the way at times.

So, here’s where it gets a little tricky and where I’m going to throw a few truth bombs out there.  I’m not doing this to make any of you feel guilty.  It’s based on some of the negative experiences I’ve had and I’m not the type of person to hold grudges or be vindictive to where I no longer support you.  I will continue to support you regardless.  I suppose I feel it just needs to be said because some have not ventured beyond their social media (these are some of those who are no longer on my own Facebook for the reasons I explained earlier) and continue to harass or say hurtful things when they are told no, and common sense goes by the way side.  And I will only speak for myself and my way of life.

I have 4 children.  That means my family is numbered to six people.  They are also four girls, two of whom are hitting puberty and we all know what that includes as far as “items” needed to support their own endeavors.  Prices only continue to go up and often times wages do not.  I am also a SAHM living off of one income in Nebraska of all places where good jobs are scarce.  Don’t get me wrong, my husband makes enough to support us and our way of life, but I have to do what’s best for my entire family and be respectful of the amount of hours and work my husband puts in for our income.  When I do work, I have day care costs.  We all know those costs are really high these days.  It’s simply expensive to raise children these days, period.  I also have to consider my own allergies.  I used to love Mary Kay products.  My piano teacher sold them and achieved enough sales for a vehicle!  That’s a pretty awesome deal, right!?  Well, as I got older I realized that a lot of their products had a fragrance in them that would make me break out.  I could no longer use Mary Kay and still can’t.  Trust me, I’ve tried.  And while I’m home, not making an income, I have to consider as to whether or not your product is something I need.  If it’s not something I need I generally come to you when I need to start thinking about gifts for my family for birthdays, anniversaries, Christmas, or just because gifts.  I wish I could support every single one of you because I just want to see you succeed but I think we can all gather at this point, I’d go broke and then some.

Now, I don’t want to pick on any one in particular, but unfortunately I’m going to.  Half of the people who do sell on my social media are beach body coaches.  That means 56 of those folks sell the exact same thing and are competing against each other and that is just so incredibly hard for me to decide who gets the income.  And it constantly made me feel so guilty and it was honestly more expensive than I ever dreamed!  Typically, gym memberships are really expensive so the at home gym stuff absolutely made sense to me at one point in time in my life.  My husband and I were sold!  The costs added up though. Between the costs of the “boot camps” and the supplements we were spending more than the gym memberships.  We went upside down and obviously became discouraged.  In fact, we stopped going to the gym for a long time.  And when the time came and our family grew even larger we really had to consider our options.

I am a fairly self driven person.  I have quite a bit of self discipline and self accountability.  I never needed someone to “boost” my ego or keep me in check for doing things like the gym.  I’m fairly self motivated in that way any way.  Finances and raising children really got in the way of my own self discipline and I had to realize a new way to be self disciplined which meant that I had to find new ways to act on my self care.  It wasn’t exactly what I wanted but we all know that raising children comes with sacrifice.  So, when the opportunity of going to the gym arose we acted on it.  Our gym membership is cheap.  It’s a family rate and I can’t believe the things that come with that.  Not only do I get to get out of the house (which is something I enjoy) but I can bring my kids with me!  Or, I can go alone!  I can purchase my already-known-to-work-for-me supplements that are great for my budget!  We get to use the indoor pool and the outdoor pool (pool passes are included in our membership).  Yes, I would have to pay a little extra for the few classes they do have, but around these parts there aren’t very many nor do they have personal trainers.  Yet I’m ok with doing my own research and finding what works for me on my own (you know, self discipline).  We seriously pay less than $300 for all of this per year!  Where as, it costs any where from $140 to $400 for each session of beach body (I could be wrong here because I didn’t delve too deeply into all of the costs for beach body, just a vague search because again, there are 56 people who promote it, so to decide who gets the income each time, I just don’t have the time or the heart to do that).  This is why I do what is best for my family and for me.  Staying in my home is what gives me the excuses to not do it.  Getting outside of my comfort zone is what produces results for me in a physical way.  I just simply know myself well enough to know that staying at home to do workouts is really, genuinely not my thing.  But I’m going to continue to write encouraging messages, to share your posts, to like your posts and to continue to respond to your private messages because I really do want you to succeed!

So, I am going to continue to do what I can, that which is in my power to do, to continue to support you and your business, to see you succeed.  I know it’s not exactly what you all want from me, but I am equally grateful to those who appreciate the type of support I can give.  I hope you badass’ keep doing what you do to succeed every day!

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